Monday, August 31, 2009

Time and the grass

For many of us the this time of year, the month of August into September 2009 has brought several distinct changes. My oldest daughter Amanda is back at college. She will not be home for the High Holidays, but it is my hope that Hillel and the local Chabad will take care of her. In the next few days, my other three children will be returning to school. Emily will be a senior in HS getting ready for the big move next year to a college that remains unknown. Noah will be heading off to Walden HS as a freshman, and Ethan will be off to Middle School. Ethan will be two years from his Bar Mitzvah, and it seems like only yesterday we were celebrating Noah's achievement.

With Facebook, e-mails and the like I am able to vicariously experience all the activities of the various people that have become part of my network of friends. I read about people ending their summer jobs, and going back to work. I read about trips taken, friendships made and even today my wife was telling me about a Jewish couple that met on FB and were about to get married until the prospective wife discovered that the future husband had not gotten divorced yet. It all sounds so interesting, different and exciting.

My daughter Emily has a great summer job. She works as a lifeguard making very good money for a 16 year old. The hours are long, but the paycheck is commensurate with the hours expended. Recently, she complained that the job was boring and that she wanted something more stimulating. It was an ironic conversation we had since I was of the opinion that the job she had was extraordinary and that she should be thankful. She, on the other hand felt that there was something better out there for her. When I tried to explain to her that summer jobs are scarce and that the summer job she had allowed her to bank the money so she would not have to work during the school year, I was unable to persuade her of my position. I even tried to explain to her that with any job there would be times when the job would not be stimulating, including my own, and that for many people what she was doing was an incredible adn important job with great compensation. I was dejected since my profession, in large part, is to persuade and convince people that my position is correct.

However, about an hour later Emily came to me and on her own stated that she felt that one of her personal issues may be that there is a feeling of discontent ( I would call it for some people chronic discontent), and that she had a belief that the other person, the other job, the other opportunity was better than what she had. She stated to me that she understood what I was saying and that while there were times when her job was boring, she understood other jobs could also be boring.

Although I sometimes feel that the other person has had more fun, a better summer, a better experience and better memories (FB pictures of friends and family experiences past for example), I am reminded of that simple saying, the grass is not always greener on the other side. My friendships, memories, experiences, jobs, etc are mine and those experiences are unique and special for me. My experiences, my friendships my good times and bad times are mine.

So, as anyone who has seen my lawn will concede, my grass is almost all crabgrass. But it is lush, green and mine. There are no brown spots and it grows and grows and grows. I do not use chemicals and while it may not be Yankee Staduim quality bluegrass, and my lawn may not be the envy of anyone on the block, I know that it is a lawn that the children in the neighborhood play ball on and enjoy. It is my lawn with all of the unique memories that have happened on my little plot of G-d's green earth. And, while others have their own little plots of green and their own experiences and memories, I take stock of my lot in life, count my blessings and thank G-d for my little green patch of grass. Upon reflection, I would not trade my lot of land, or my lot in life with anyone.

Shalom. Jeremy

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